A Barely Sober Dream
Kayla knew she was tipsy (perhaps a bit more), but she didn’t care. She was too happy to care. “Why was she so happy?”, you might ask. Don’t worry about it - it doesn’t matter for this story. It’s enough to know she was feeling joy she had not felt in a very long time.
She stumbled out of the party with two wine glasses. One was full, and the other was half empty. She looked at them in her hand and exclaimed, “I don’t like glasses half empty.” She proceeded to knock back the wine in the half empty glass. Staring and smiling at the other glass, she said, “Now my glass is positively full.” There may have been a hiccup at this point.
Home wasn’t too far away. So in bad taste, she decided to walk home. Feeling this great makes you feel invincible - which is never a good thing when you’re a woman walking home late at night. The short dress, high heels, and glass of wine probably didn’t help either. Kayla turned down a familiar street, which was darker than she remembered. But her thoughts were busy with his dark eyes, his devious smile, and what he confessed to her that night. I’m starting to wonder why she even left the party. Her reverie was broken when she heard rustling in a bush nearby.
“Probably another rat in this city… they are everywhere.”
She walked halfway down the block when she suddenly got goosebumps and an urge to look behind her. Not expecting to see anything, she half-heartedly glanced back. When she looked ahead again, it registered that there was in fact something behind her. But no matter how much alcohol she had drunk that night, Kayla (quite literally) could not believe her eyes.
She turned around again and sure enough, it was exactly what she saw the first time. A bear charging towards her in the middle of Lincoln Square.
She yelled, “WHAT THE FUCK?!?!”
We all know you are supposed to play dead if a bear is coming to maul you. However, when Kayla saw its determined and grimacing face, she knew it was actually coming for her. Playing dead would surely make her really dead. Kayla immediately threw her wine glass into the grass (so much for a full glass), kicked off her heels, and made a run for it.
Bears run fast - look it up. Given away by her raspy breathing, she knew she had mere seconds before she was dinner. Lost in the confusion of why a bear was in this quaint neighborhood of Chicago, Kayla couldn’t also help but think “Why?? Why ruin a perfectly good night?!”.
:::HONK:::HONK:::::
A van appeared at the intersection of Wilson and Western. Still running and possibly crying, Kayla could see women hanging out the windows and laughing,
“Holy shit! Is that a bear?!”
Understandably, Kayla did not share in their amusement. But she was absolutely relieved to see the bear change direction towards the van, and completely forgetting about her. More food I guess.
Kayla didn’t bother sticking around. She was fully sober now, albeit somewhat traumatized to ever let herself be that happy again.