Simply Kayla

I read recently (as of this morning in fact) about the concept of eternal recurrence, the idea that we might be reliving the same moments over and over again due to the entropic nature of the universe. I’m sure you’d agree it is a profound and thought-provoking one – and perhaps a bit scary. It’s a concept that has been explored by philosophers and scientists alike (like Nietzsche, although he didn’t mean it literally), and it raises some fascinating questions about the nature of time, consciousness, and existence itself.

If we were to accept this notion as a possibility, it would have to change our perspective on life. Clearly, it’s got me thinking. For some, the idea of reliving the same life, with all its joys and sorrows, triumphs and failures, might seem like a nightmare. The thought of being trapped in an endless loop, repeating the same mistakes and experiences, would be quite hellish.

However, for others, the idea of eternal recurrence could be a source of comfort. It could offer a sense of hope and meaning, knowing that even after we die, we will continue to exist in some form. It could also provide a sense of perspective, reminding us that our individual lives are just a small part of a much larger cycle. Although, unifying us in a way where we are all fated to repeat these lives, it definitely isn’t fair. Some of us get dealt a shit hand in life. 

Luckily for me, I was dealt a good hand. Not great, but good enough that the idea of eternal recurrence is oddly comforting. It’s not that I’m eager to relive all of my experiences, especially the cringe-worthy moments that I’d rather forget. But the thought of simply ceasing to exist, of disappearing into nothingness, is far more frightening to me.

The idea of starting over again, even if I’m not aware of it, offers a sense of continuity. Some may believe it gives our lives a kind of inherent value and meaning, even if we can’t always see it. But I still believe we don’t have a universal purpose – we just are. But because humans are self-centered, the idea of repeating my life for no reason gives me comfort. 

Of course, there are many questions that arise from this concept. For example, if we are reliving the same moments over and over again, does that mean that our consciousness is also repeating? Or is it possible that our consciousness is somehow evolving or changing with each iteration?

These are questions that we may never be able to answer definitively. But the very act of contemplating them can lead us to a deeper understanding of ourselves and the universe we inhabit. As I’ve mentioned to many (who probably think I’ve read too much science fiction), there are definitely functions of our brain that we don’t know how to use yet, ones that we haven’t even thought of. 

The concept of eternal recurrence also raises questions about free will. If our lives are predetermined, then do we really have any control over our actions? Or are we simply playing out a script that has already been written? The one plus side here is that it was written by us – it’s just we don’t get any do overs because without remembering, why would we? 

But then I think of our déjà vu and gut instinct moments – is there something in our consciousness that is telling us we’ve done this before? We’ve done this an infinite number of times, therefore we know how this story ends.

I personally can say I’ve experienced this a few times. It was a moment when I knew someone was going to break up with me. I’ve been dumped before and it’s easy to see the signs (or at least it is easy to look back and find the signs you missed). With this relationship there were no signs. We were extremely happy (or so I thought). But when I sat in the theatre one night, a huge wave of sadness washed over me. It came from nowhere and I was completely taken aback – it ruined the movie. I dreaded going back home that night because I knew our relationship was coming to an end. Sure enough, it was a breakup letter (in the form of an email). I mean, good riddance to someone who breaks up over an email, but how did I know that was going to happen? Does a coincidence actually mean this has played out in the universe before?

Again, these are complex questions with no easy answers. But I think they are questions that are worth exploring, as they can help us to grapple with some of the mysteries of existence. Plus it’s fun to contemplate them over a drink with friends (if they are patient enough). 

I don’t know. I just needed to get that out there because the idea is fascinating. We all are a part of this cosmic narrative and I know I’m not the only one thinking about it.

And if you’ll permit me to drag on for a bit longer…

While I find the idea of a universal meaning of life to be rather elusive (we for sure won’t find the answer to that question out in the “unknown”), I do believe that it’s our job to create our own meaning, to find purpose and fulfillment in our own unique ways. Especially if, depending on what hand we were dealt, we are gifted or doomed to repeat it for infinity. 

So as long as there are questions to be answered, our lives will always have meaning. We just have to make the most of it. 

---

© 2024 December, Kayla Macias